Free Advice: On 'Invisibility'


I'm calling "Bullshit" on "Invisiblity over 50". 

That being said, I certainly understand the feeling of not being recognized and/or validated in a variety of social and professional settings from time to time but in the final analysis, my personal feelings of invisibility had very little to do with age and has everything to do with my state of mind and those people I come in contact with.

Socially: Have you ever walked into a room full of fabulous people all chit-chatting, laughing and apparently having a good time but knew that no one sees you or could care less if you were there or not?  Me too! Chances are, you don't really know these people and if you did, you probably wouldn't want to hang out with them anyway. When I'm in these situations, I either...

a) Leave.
b) Find someone who looks as uncomfortable as I do and ask ..."So, How do you know X and Y? " or "Are you originally from Dallas (or wherever)?"

I consider this example to be an opportunity to help out my fellow invisible wallflower.

Professionally: Have you ever been treated as inconsequential by a doctor or banker? Ha! Me too! Asking questions of an arrogant bastard has proven to be helpful - especially if they are talking at you and not with you..."I'm sorry but I'm not certain that you heard me, my question is..." and another good one is to "mirror" the offensive comment back to them so that the asshole can hear what you just heard..."So what you are saying to me is ..... Am I correct?"

Many times arrogant bastards are just that and sometimes they are just really poor communicators.

The moral to my story is that invisibility happens to all of us at one time or another. Whether you are in your 20's, 30's, 40's, 50's and beyond.

Our choice is to roll over and accept it or... not.
Thank you to my muses, Bobbie & Lorraine on this post.

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