Free Advice: On Falling in Love - Part Six


OK, so what started out as 'free advice' is turning into our love story. That being said, bear with me. It's just my way of illustrating how I learned all about falling in love.

I'm sure that by now you're thinking... "C'mon, this is all fine and good but hey, I need a real-live person to try my 'lovability'and 'vulnerability' out on".

I'm getting to that. In the interim, lets's review a few key points that I have learned to be helpful in falling in love...
  1. Recognize that you are 'loveable'.
  2. Allow yourself to be 'vulnerable'.
  3. Accept that things are not always 'black and white'. Sometimes they are grey.

Back to lunch...
He was "separated" and I had some thinking to do. I called Kathy. "Just be friends" she said simply. Huh. What a concept. The old Joanie would have probably just written him off as someone with "too many complications". The new Joanie was really in need of his friendship.

I did have some misgivings though. He and his wife could reconcile and/or the chemistry between us could prove to make a platonic friendship ahem, challenging. But, remaining wounded and vulnerable after the sudden loss of Rob & Betsy a few weeks before, I decided..."What the hell. I've been hurt before and I'll most likely get hurt again but I'll survive."

Friends, we were and I soon learned of the advantages in being 'just friends' with a heterosexual man...
  • You can be who you are
  • You can say what you want
  • You can eat what you want 
For someone who had only been 'friends' with women and homosexual men, this was a refreshing change. I had always looked at straight guys as potential husbands and my behaviours reflected a woman who dressed, ate and acted the way I thought I should. Ahhhh, I was finally getting that Shakespearean quote, "To thine own self, be true" Who knew? Love: Part 7

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